Which do you prefer … criticism or praise

July 31, 2018

If you said criticism I have the number of a counselor who may be able to help you!  Let’s face it most of us want to be built up and recognized for what we do … at our jobs and more importantly … in our homes.  Yet, the place where we tend to take each other for granted more than any other is in our homes.  That’s because we are expecting our spouses to be kind, loving partners who faithfully perform all of his or her responsibilities …

And, if you’re like me, you often wonder if you are doing a good job at being the spouse, parent or grandparent that your family wants you to be.  Our hearts yearn to know that we are appreciated for what we are doing.

Affirmation is given verbally … we speak it or write it … it involves sharing the things you appreciate about those in your life.  Our spouses, children and grandkids all need to hear that they are loved, appreciated and valuable to us.  Affirmations breathe life, health and strength into their hearts!  They will feel security in your loving words.

When we don’t get enough affirmation we tend to work hard to earn it … we become pleasers … or perfectionists … hoping that our performance will be good enough to earn acceptance and love.  Those behaviors are not healthy and will lead to insecurity, doubt and frustration.

So how do you affirm?  An easy way to start is to look for things to say Thank You for.  Thank you for taking the time to make this great meal … I love coming home and feeling so special.  Thank you for listening to your mom and doing what she asked you to do.  Thanks for working so hard to take care all of us!

I Thessalonians 5:11 admonishes us to “encourage each other and build each other up … “

Catch those you love in doing what is good and right … and thank them for it .. even if it is “expected.”  It may feel a little awkward at first … but keep working at it because it make a big difference in the hearts and lives of those you love!

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