Can I ask you a personal question? Do you love to be affirmed, to hear the words: nice job … good work … you look nice … that was a wonderful meal … and just a genuine heart felt “Thank you!”?
Truth is we all long to be affirmed! Because those positive words really say, we are loved and accepted for who we are … and what we do. Someone has said that affirmation and encouragement are food for the heart … and every heart is a hungry heart.
The trouble is that we live in a world that works harder to tear us down … than it does to build us up. Unfortunately for many of us … we were raised in families were the expectations were high and filled with comparisons and criticism … while affirmation and encouragement was scarce. Maybe we find ourselves in a marriage that is not affirming or encouraging us!
When we don’t receive affirmation … we begin to doubt our self-worth … we live in fear … of what others think about us … that we will look foolish … that we will be judged … we feel guilty … and all of that leaves us feeling anxious, alone and isolated. Tragically, we may also begin to believe that God doesn’t even like or approve of us either.
Because our hearts long for affirmation … we will do anything to get it; and this often leads us down a negative path of working hard to try to win love and acceptance.
So what do we do? First, understand that God does love you … warts and all! The Bible tells us that “there is nothing that separates us from the love of God.”
Second, take the lead in becoming an affirmer and encourager. Remember the golden rule: Do unto others, as you would like to have done to you. Chances are your spouse and kids may not be feeling loved and affirmed either. Work hard to make your home a place of encouragement. Look for the good and positive things that are happening in your home and verbally acknowledge them.
Why not start feeding those hungry hearts in your marriage and family today?!
