Recently I heard a sermon that challenged me deeply; the pastor shared he knew 8 magical words that could conquer any conflict in a marriage. He went on to say that these magic words have the power to shatter strongholds, tear down barriers; and would bring healing to arguments that couples have. These words could alter perception.
WOW! As one who is in marriage ministry I was eager to discover what these “magic” words were! Before letting us in on his secret, the pastor warned us that these 8 magical words may be harder for us to say than we might imagine. He was afraid that many of us would not have the strength and courage to utter these powerful words to our spouses.
We were on the edge of our seats. The moment of truth was upon us. So with a dramatic pause he clearly articulated these 8 magical words:
“I was wrong. You were right. I’m sorry.”
My initial thought was … that’s it!? I was wrong … you were right … and I’m sorry! Then the attitude needed to speak those words hit me like a ton of bricks; I realized how powerful that simple and humble phrase could be in marriages.
James 5:16 says, “Confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed.”
I Peter 4:8 continues, “Above all, keep loving one another earnestly, since love covers a multitude of sins.”
Over the years I’ve come to realize that when arguments occur in my marriage, both of us begin to do and say things that are not honoring and glorifying to God.
When I say, and truly mean, these 8 words I’m admitting my mistakes, and beginning to diffuse the pressure that has been building between us. By assuming my responsibility in the argument, and accepting the consequences of my mistakes, Karen and I can start moving towards reconciliation and renewed relationship with each other.
So, the next time you find yourself in the middle of a battle with your spouse, remember these 8 magical words and give them a try.
Let us know how they work for you!