Living in a world of crumbling marriages, you probably ask yourself the question “Am I a good spouse?” And if you’re like me, you might say “I’m better than average.” But what does that mean? And do I only want to be just better than average? The real question is “How can I become the best spouse possible?” So here are four questions that are going to help us answer that.
1. Am I making my spouse my number one priority? It’s too easy to put jobs, kids, hobbies and so much more into the top priority slot of our lives. When we neglect our spouses, we’re setting them up to look for attention somewhere else. The follow up question to this one is…If there is something in my life that’s more important to me than my spouse, is that person, place or thing worth losing my marriage over?
2. Am I still actively pursuing my spouse? Many of us look at marriage as a check the box activity. We get married, check the box and move on to the next life goal. To be a great spouse, we need to keep actively wooing our mates, keep flirting, dating and doing those things we did to win his or her heart before we get married. Follow up question…What can I do today to win the heart of my spouse?
2. Am I sharing more than I’m hiding? You know, after years of marriage, couples easily fall into boring routines, and heart to heart conversations quickly fade into mundane chit chat about day to day stuff. Great spouses never give up on sharing their hearts with one another. We need to get past the simple “How is your day”?, and start opening up about what we’re really thinking and how we’re really feeling. Follow up question…What’s an issue that’s on my heart right now that I need to share with my spouse?
4. Am I protecting myself from things that can harm or kill our marriage? Our culture is filled with enemies that seek to destroy marriages…addictions, strong anti-marriage messages from family, friends and media and selfishness top the list. But don’t let a lack of personal discipline and self-control kill your marriage. Follow up question…What are you doing to guard against these invaders and who is holding you accountable?
I hope that these four questions and their follow ups will put you on the path to becoming the best spouse you can be.
90 Percent of Failing Couples Have Stopped Asking this Simple Question
